Are negative feelings about your current weight inhibiting — or totally destroying — your desire to have sexual interactions with your partner? It’s a common primary or contributing cause of low sexual desire, particularly among women.

Body image is a critical contributor to people’s feelings about being sexual, and it’s one of my Milestones of Sexual Development. I have seen insecurities that came with being teased for being a chubby child or adolescent lead to social anxiety, depression, sexual inhibition, and both total sexual avoidance and sexual compulsions in adults. 

I commonly meet individuals and couples where one person’s sexuality is negatively affected by recent changes in weight. Bodies change for many reasons: aging, illness, medications, childbearing, or even the stress of a pandemic, for example.

I frequently hear refrains like these from partners:

• “My wife feels so bad about her body that she won’t have sex with the lights on. She wants to turn the lights off and get under the covers. I can’t even see what I am doing.”

• “He is so heavy now that I don’t think he’s even in touch with his sexuality. He’s under so much stress that all he does is eat. I love him, but this is really upsetting me. I work hard to stay in shape, and I think I am still attractive. I wish he would lose some weight. His total disinterest in me sexually is depressing, and it’s giving me a complex.”

I know how hard it is to lose weight. Most of mother’s side of the family have had lifelong struggles with weight. Recently, Dr. Mache Seibel’s blog drew my attention to a new pharmacological intervention which might help people who have struggled with weight loss finally succeed. The medication is called Semaglutide, and it’s getting some good press.

You might want to check it out find out what your physician thinks about it.

It’s always worth investing in yourself.