The most interesting thing about the 2016 Golden Globe Awards was not the highly predictable winners but rather the highly predictable barbs thrown Hollywood’s way by contentious host Rick Gervais.
After referring to the audience as “disgusting, pill-popping, sexual deviant scum,” Gervais announced the following: “I’m going to do this monologue and then go into hiding. Not even Sean Penn will find me . . . snitch.”
The brash Brit launched an early attack at the television network that aired the program.
“It’s right that NBC should host this award show. They’re the only network that’s truly fair and impartial and that’s because they’re the only network with zero nominations. So … nothing in it for ‘em tonight.”
“They don’t care, obviously,” Gervais said, pointing to himself.
In a particularly politically incorrect bit, the host was met with a mixture of laughs and groans as he said, “I’m going to be nice tonight. I’ve changed — not as much as Bruce Jenner, obviously. Now Caitlyn Jenner, of course. What a year she’s had! She became a role model for trans-people everywhere, showing great bravery in breaking down barriers and destroying stereotypes.
"She didn’t do a lot for women drivers. But you can’t have everything, can ya? Not at the same time.”
Gervais launched a humor missile at the Globes themselves by citing a dirty little Hollywood secret. “One publication said me hosting would mean some film stars would stay away for fear of being made fun of. As if film stars would stay away from a chance of getting a Golden Globe — particularly if their film company has already paid for it,” Gervais cracked.
The host used an intro to a movie to take a swipe at a notorious Hollywood director.
“The excellent ‘Spotlight’ has been nominated. Yeah. The Catholic Church are furious about the film as it exposes that 5 percent of all their priests have repeatedly molested children and been allowed to continue to work without punishment. Roman Polanski called it ‘the best date movie ever,’” Gervais said.
He placed Jennifer Lawrence in his sights when he said that the actress had “made the news when she demanded equal pay for women in Hollywood. She received overwhelming support from people everywhere. There were marches on the street with nurses and factory workers saying, ‘How the hell can a 25-year-old live on $52 million?’”
Gervais referred to the strange penchant that the Hollywood Foreign Press has in classifying Golden Globe nominees by pointing out that the organization “deemed ‘The Martian’ a comedy and even nominated it. And hence, Matt Damon is here tonight. So that worked a treat, didn’t it? To be fair, ‘The Martian’ was a lot funnier than ‘Pixels.’ But then again, so was ‘Schindler’s List.’”
In another non-PC punchline, Gervais said, “All-female remakes are the big thing. There’s a female remake of ‘Ghostbusters.’ There’s going to be a female remake of ‘Ocean’s 11.’
"And this is brilliant for the studios because they get guaranteed box office results and they don’t have to spend too much money on the cast.”
Taking an additional shot at the Globes, Gervais told the assembled celebrities, “Remember if you do win tonight, no one cares about that award as much as you do. Don’t get emotional, it’s embarrassing. That award is, no offense, worthless. It’s a bit of metal some nice old confused journalists wanted to give you in person so they could meet you and have a selfie with you, okay? That’s all it is!”
The host took the opportunity to bring actor Matt Damon to the podium by saying, “He’s the only person Ben Affleck hasn’t been unfaithful to.”
He introduced presenter Mel Gibson by sarcastically saying, “I’m in the awkward position of having to introduce him again. Listen, I’m sure it’s embarrassing for both of us.”
Gibson got some big laughs when he shot back at Gervais with the following: “I like seeing Ricky once every three years. It reminds me to get a colonoscopy.”
James Hirsen, J.D., M.A., in media psychology, is a New York Times best-selling author, media analyst, and law professor. Visit Newsmax TV Hollywood. Read more reports from James Hirsen — Click Here Now.
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