Former "Bachelorette" star Kaitlyn Bristowe is opening up about her past addiction to Valium and the heartache that led her there.
Speaking in the first episode of her new YouTube series, Nine to Wine, Bristowe, 34, recalled how she suffered from severe depression in her 20s, after following her then-boyfriend halfway across the world to live with him in Germany.
She was having regular emotional breakdowns at the time and it interfered with her relationship. Things ended abruptly and Bristowe moved back home with her mother and stepdad. Heartbroken, jobless and unmotivated, she decided to seek help from a doctor, who handed her a prescription for Valium.
"I'm a big believer in medication, always up to your doctor and you, but I believe in it. Valium I had never known really what that was or what that would do to me," she said. "It made me numb. I didn't feel anything. I got to sleep. I got to not feel my feelings."
Bristowe's weight began to plummet and her family grew concerned.
"That was when somebody had to shake me and say, ‘You cannot live like this, this is not you,'" she said. It was through the help of her mother that Bristowe found the will to get her life back on track again.
"I was sick of being numb. I wanted to feel feelings again. I wanted to go back to Vancouver and get a job and start over and meet people and get out. So I did," she said.
Bristowe found a job working in the restaurant industry and was later cast on Season 19 of "The Bachelor," according to Fox News. She is now dating franchise contestant Jason Tartick and living in Nashville. Bristowe managed to turn her life around and wishes she could give her younger self some sound advice.
"I always think if I could go back to my 27-year-old self and talk to her I would say, 'You can't let anyone be responsible for your own happiness. That is up to you,'" she said. "Now I can say that because I am in a loving fulfilling happy relationship."
Zoe Papadakis ✉
Zoe Papadakis is a Newsmax writer based in South Africa with two decades of experience specializing in media and entertainment. She has been in the news industry as a reporter, writer and editor for newspapers, magazine and websites.
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