Hayden Panettiere is speaking out for the first time about her past addiction to opioids and alcohol.
In an interview with People, the former "Nashville" star admitted that her yearslong battle with addiction nearly ended her career and life.
"I was on top of the world, and I ruined it. I'd think I hit rock bottom, but then there's that trap door that opens," she said.
Panettiere admitted it has been a tough journey to sobriety.
"This hasn't been easy, and there were a lot of ups and downs," she said. "But I don't regret even the ugliest things that have happened to me. I feel incredibly accomplished. And I feel like I have a second chance."
A former child star, Panettiere traces her addiction to age 15, when someone from her team offered her "happy pills" before she walked the carpets. They were meant to make her "peppy" during interviews. She said she was unaware that it was inappropriate, and it was about to a downward spiral.
As her career flourished, things "kept getting out of control. And as I got older, the drugs and alcohol became something I almost couldn't live without," she said.
Then Panettiere, who shares 7-year-old daughter Kaya with her ex, Wladimir Klitschko, became pregnant. She stopped drinking but after giving birth, fell off the rails. Her drinking was in part due to postpartum depression.
"I never had the feeling that I wanted to harm my child, but I didn't want to spend any time with her," Panettiere said. "There was just this gray color in my life."
Her relationship with Klitschko, whom she began dating in 2009, crumbled and eventually, in 2018, Panettiere was forced to make a tough decision to send Kaya to live with Klitschko in Ukraine.
"It was the hardest thing I ever had to do," she said. "But I wanted to be a good mom to her — and sometimes that means letting them go."
The drinking only worsened after that, and Panettiere landed a in hospital suffering from jaundice.
"Doctors told me my liver was going to give out," she recalled. "I was no longer a 20-year-old who could just bounce right back."
The turning point came when Panettiere entered rehab for eight months. She explained to People it was there that she learned the tools "to get over the hump" of her addiction. However, only recently did the star admitted she was able to find peace.
"It's an everyday choice, and I'm checking in with myself all the time," Panettiere said. "But I'm just so grateful to be part of this world again, and I will never take it for granted again."
Zoe Papadakis ✉
Zoe Papadakis is a Newsmax writer based in South Africa with two decades of experience specializing in media and entertainment. She has been in the news industry as a reporter, writer and editor for newspapers, magazine and websites.
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